Christina

Sunday, January 25, 2015

To Sum It Up

So, this girl is being all prim and proper punishing me for parental age people.

Wow, she do a lotta work for a lotta money, think they all can punish me, like maybe she's better. You are getting me back for things when I'm very good and do what I'm supposed to do. Got a little grudge? Have it no more. I don't believe in this, and ya'll are mean and how bad is that??

How Mean and Beastly

Every time I want something, this person says something against me to fly and float it past.

Predicament

I'm tired of this person lacing all the messages with me with utter hate. She wants someone else to live the dream over me. She has no right to punish me. She keeps acting like I'm guilty, and I'm getting sick of it. I don't wanna see her perverted creations in the world, the whirlpool of hatred. She'll make some excuse to get people off her temporarily. She's just a machine in a way exerting hatred and ruining people's esteem. What is the meaning of all this? I can see her denying it to make me look bad, but I didn't tell you who all it was.

RACIST!

Pampering only 1 person and not the other.

Post by Bella Thorne.

Perhaps, it is you who do not need any benefits in life.

Apology (was not talking to the person in the picture)

Post by Bella Thorne.

This girl either needs or is getting help. Ugh! I hate that.

You know big sis has a handle on her. ;o BFFs. ;o

Ugh!

Post by Bella Thorne.

THIS girl is gonna learn it's not all about her but that other people can be made more attractive! Ugh, I hate that.

Do you want me to go thru life fighting people? Saying what I am and what I want when it's not?

I can't even say "what" it was cuz "what" is inappropriate. I'll go ahead and accept, but I do feel like something is following me, a message, made to appear in a bad way because of someone else/others.

Issue

I don't really have problems with what I'm thinking of, but I see they are literally "pleasure"ing up someone who cares for no one but herself. Like, oh yea Christina is a loser maybe and I don't know about what I have other than that I'm not the 1 in the same way. Like, okay Christina you're a loser, when I'm the one who just thought of some related issue. Like, she doesn't realize that people are being mean to me and like she doesn't have to care, which she doesn't, but why speak to me in such a manner? I don't think she is supposed to do it, but I dunno.. Like, she is making fun of me being looked down on, without really thinking about it. Nevermind who all does this and who it might be I'm talking about. I dunno who made this idea, but I bet it wasn't her..

Like, oh okay, I see you're upset. *sticks tongue out at me* Like I am proper and did it right, I didn't realize anything else is going on or matters concerning you. It's hard to describe.

So the reason I posted this is because it is important. About what happened, it makes sense, but I feel made fun of and uncomfortable. I don't think it really happened what you're thinking, it was sorta a lotta things happening. I dunno where it came from.

I see the person's thoughts stopping after thinking about it, like she won something, which is good, good for yas! Maybe, I lost, but I got some other messages along with what supposedly could have been symbolized. She didn't really go thru the kind of thing I did, too. What do these people ever do?? I don't want this to be my blog.

I don't wanna forever juggle this instance and as a conflict, neither.

I mean the person 1st makes the judgement and then stops thinking after that sorta offing me. Like, she's spoiled over others in some way and just doesn't have anything to say.

Sorry, I did not mean to twist the meaning or anything. Sorry the start of this post was a bit rough.

Dr. Phil - Facebook

not telling parents you have problems with your marriage

I remember this case well. You're right, it's like lying and your parents might not get that.

---

you can be the star of your own show in life

That's not really true for me in my conscience.

I do not accept things that are wrong. I'm not locked in a cage.

Showertime

cont.

the people experimenting on me changing how things load on my computer and noises in the garage where I stay.

Problem

They keep being really nasty to me.

Spoiled Brats

People born around 1960 think that babies should not have exsited and think they have the magic button of righteousness just because they are jealous.

Blondes just feel they were better people.

You can see it in their ability to stay flushed. How sick is that. That's not how you keep your hair blonde, is it?

So

Congratulations to you being set to win cuz it was about me.. but I wanted it to be about me more like that insofar as this person is considered so good and to rise to the top of all putting me down. I never asked to change my life for the worse but to feed me more attention of lesser quality. No one needs that.

So, I harbor no hard feelings on this innocent person, even if life gets in the way and makes it hard, "as it does for us all." I am only happy they can enjoy things. I hope they get to enjoy it as much as I do. I'm not really hear harboring all the attention. People aren't really nice to me much: these noises in my room and the way the computer loads and the annoying way my parents and others act.

Short Reiteration

Record music and voice >>

Problems

I had a dream of something, and someone else probably got the real deal. I was very mad, and my dad came in and acted like, "See? That's it." He didn't see me mad.

They are constantly making annoying noises at me and claimed I thought in a gloss something inappropriate about someone.

I noticed they are thinking my aunt's husband is better cuz he wasn't a farmer. My dad doesn't seem to act right, quite, but I'm still flooded with his annoyance.

It was wrong of you to rub in something to me about someone. I'm not talking to anyone in particular. I do mean something in particular. I just don't want it to get worse.

Kinda what happened to me was very inappropriate.

I am not a spoiled brat. They still did it and I can't change it. I didn't do anything. You're so nice to other people.

I bet they are so mean or "cheap" that they are using something wrong my old friends believe in in making fun of me with some things.

Now, they cannot change what they did to me and they probably did it right for someone else or could already. Others probably all get it that way. I'm particularly upset if a certain someone is getting it, but I don't want to take it from them.

They keep rubbing in wrong things/lies to me. Like, they are taunting me about the order I did something.

This will never be okay by me. I do not forgive things that cannot change. I'm not talking to anyone in particular. I know this was done for someone else. You all just make me fat on these meds and call me ugly and worthless. You don't have a right to dig into the lives of others like that, thinking you're the Santa Claus of social class.

So, I am not trying to talk of anyone in particular and don't mean that in that way. I know it's the laid back efforts of a group of people manipulating my life. If not, then so be it. I won't complain quite like this unless I know it's because of others, but it still seems to be the same kinda situation to at least talk about. I don't wanna talk about it, but we'll see what I find.

You all show someone off over me. I didn't "lose." I'm just not a drama queen, and these med make me tired and fatter. I'm underprivileged, gypped and framed. I don't want uncool things.

My dad came home, not quite right how he was so I wanted him to leave me alone after since I was out at the time I said hi. I don't mean anything, but I was upset. I know the facts. I just know that someone else got something over me. They supposedly deserve something better. People keep stealing from me and maybe in some way others to make it better for someone else and to rub it in. I feel I am eternally mad, I must admit. "Ooh, you missed a spot." I never did anything bad. They made something for me in a situation I will not accept. I can tap into it. I think it was the day mom rubbed in something mean to me from someone else being "better" supposedly. I am being taunted by a certain somebody..

So, I dunno, I feel I have an emotional scar or disability/handicap. I mean nothing bad to the other person involved in the same position. I don't see why it was done 1st, like it has to mean anything or is even that important in such a manner. It's like people really don't care about it. I know the message is in the negative. You all rub in someone for someone else, and I don't think it matters and you're lying I deserve this and that I'm bad which supposedly means that. I don't give a care about ya'll. I'm good. I don't need your guidance. This is a real nuisance, I'll have you know. I get too many problems from you all every day. I cannot get back an answer in the affirmative, which they think I got.. or think I would even get. How cruel was this? Just "in case?" Or people just really hate me when they follow me and this other person around? I'll say what I like. I don't care about ya'll.

As to what it was, the only problem is the way they arranged things and how they make other people feel better off than me now. I don't really care to discus this other than the fact I am scarred. I know other people are being treated okay. I am happy with things and not picky, but I can see this coming. Someone keeps "making it right" for someone else. I don't seem to matter. I could d** right now, and it would be seen my life is so bad.

Nite Soon

Do you know any people

who overreact about people needing to be "punished."

I don't wanna play ring around the rosy with dishonest people. Some people can't seem to make their point.

Problem

They are spinning the fat or meat on my face. I can feel it jiggle as I type on my neck.

How pathetic and mean and dishonest. Boy, if someone caught you.

I was speaking in general, your highness's.. :)

..about what state my dad is in.

Story

There was a smart girl fairy without wings without elf ears regular size named Christina. She had a friend named Bella who was an angel of the Lord. Christina was 25, and Bella was only 15. Christina was dressed in purple, and Bella in yellow. There was another friend who was 15 named Chloe Grace. She wore green, like Tinkerbell. So, they were 3 normal girls. Chloe was a witch, tho.

They all sat on a bank eating some delicious sandwiches with exquisite sauce and bread. A wizard named Phil came up to them. Chloe and Christina shied away, but Bella said, "Hi!"

"Hello," said Phil as he bent over and tipped his cap. "Now, I need the help of someone-"

"I'll do it!" said Christina, as though it was like joining the military.

"Okay," he turned her away. He gave Bella a goodbye rub. The 2 girls ran off together.

Christina tried to keep up the pace with him. She skipped along his long strides. He was 6'4" in real life, and she only had stood at 5'4".

"I want you to come on a trip with us mortals," he said. He looked at her. "You're going to partake in a caravan with us all and look after children."

"Splendid!" she gave back.

The caravan was set. They all went. She watched over the children walking alongside the wagon where they sayed. She kept a sharp eye.

Finally, it was time to settle. They set a fire all around. Christina woke up and saw 2 red, glowing eyes staring at her. Another girl woke up who was about 5 and screamed. Phil, as did the others, picked up the girl. Christina darted toward the animal and off it went. What if it could leap over the fire? What if there were giant cats? Christina heaved. A nice boy who was 35 picked up Christina and kissed her. They went to bed.

Morning followed, and they reached the carnival. She went on the rather abandoned yet elaborately set up tunnel of love, and Phil was there with his best friend. He said hi. Christina laughed. She hated the ferris-wheel, for real. Phil kicked her onto it, and it was really all the drama. She hated the boat ride that swung back and forth and the tower rides. The 35-year-old boy who picked her up went with her, and she was so sick. She never touched a tower ride.

They all went back, in the end of some spectacular rides.

It was dangerous. Christina worked in the home of Phil taking care of kids. He studied these young kids. When they had to all leave she left with the kids and Phil and became the servant. Finally, the children left, and Christina went to Africa because she always loved it and learned to speak Afrikkans and lived in a nice house in a village she found.

The End again!

cont.

I didn't mean anything by it other than it fit something, like @ the mood. I'm just some person online posting on her blog like any other person who would blot out the word and add "..." So let it go.

Realization

Sorry if I scared you or made you mad putting "d**..."

Adults Who Are Still Like Teens

Does not make me not an adult.

Problem

They loaded my page funny and now I feel it's distorted. How pathetic.

Problems

I'm not ignorant. People have problems because of their own hate and unwilingness to back down a confrontation. I seen it with my own 2 eyes.

How should I d**..

slow and painful? I won't be here to torture in 80 years.

Why would I sit here and communicate with you?

If my parents don't matter, the neither would someone else. You don't seem to believe anything suggestive like that, tho.

This is horrible.

My mom at present only sees thru one eye and is in glasses for the 1st time, like a year back.. and my dad seems to be picked on.

I wish

you wouldn't pick on my family, whoever does.

Things That Make No Sense

If I don't wanna be forever guilty like I'm a m*****er that needs to be locked up.

What if

what is best for Dr. Phil those "good" quality kids born in 1997-1998 rather than us messed up weirdos?

Check out my Likes on Facebook

link

After All I've Done

they are flooding me with more insults

Food!

How Pathetic

They always light a new fire. My computer is slow for the 1st time.

Why would I wanna talk to someone who does this?

Problem

They are being mean to me. They twisted my face.

So

All because of my dad I can't resort to anything in life, even a healthy dieting habit in my mind and schedule.

Saturday, January 24, 2015

Upset

I am personally upset about all the cursing I did ruining things for me, but I've explained why. Basically, I think it is the right thing to do just to prove to people that anyone can communicate, not just bad guys. I was careful not to directly curse anyone, in some ways was upset at my dad bothering me but didn't take it out on someone else. I am sad people believe they need to get into my life all of a sudden and be mean to me, whoever does this.

So, what, just be sorry I was so stupid and supposedly mean? I have suffered a lot from others. Even my dad does not seem to know me in the right way. I am not gonna be tacky and say I accept this, and I must say it is not a nice thing to do to someone. My life seems always halted and tired with the unnecessary meds. I have to adjust to what's slammed into my face by the likes of people like my dad, who I care about, too. I don't wanna be treated like I'm okay, but I cannot forgive people for manipulating me and interfering me. People make mistakes, and I explained mine which was not really intentional. It's too bad. I have adamantly supported not torturing people in prison and finding out what's wrong with them because it is crazy to commit a crime more than being paranoid. I know it sets an example for others. Another thing I wonder is if not on a place online to get out your thoughts available sorta to the world, then how else? I had to relearn what I grew up seeing other people encouraging. I find if I am good, I do not get what I want still. Even when I didn't have grudges on me sorta. What I have to relearn is that it's not for me about saying whatever I feel to a close friend/person, but I have to always be on guard. See? That's something people are told to do. There's no answer. I'm not the baby of the world, like people born in 1997-1998. They would accept a mistake as small as "what" I've done overall from them. I didn't harass anyone. I didn't start the fights.

I am told that I can't figure out what was wrong. I do not want to live in the bad ways of things my dad does. Why is it all about who my dad is and not my mom in any good way?? They think it's blocked out as wrong already cuza how my dad thinks. Well, I am not gonna be the sacrificial lamb to get close to these ridiculous things.

So, these things do happen. I don't mean to rub in my innocence. I don't want someone else to have this happen to them, to be mocked in front of "important people" and the world. Can we talk about this? Or just go and watch others fall?

It's okay if you don't like me, but I'm not bad.

You might think I did bad things, but I grew up as a very good person 99.9%. Why be so mean to me? That is the only time you can get mad at someone, too, I learned growing up. So, I have to unlearn this, since you all made new rules I could not seem to register in my brain. I don't believe in Jesus, if that's what you're wondering. I believe he was a crazy man. Everyone today knows what Jesus said more than ever. To be nice and forgive. I can certainly see you all don't believe in Jesus, as well. You all don't even care if I d**, supposedly, but who knows, could happen.

So, yes, I am sorry for my stupidity but do not submit to you, you were mean to me, someone was. I don't submit to people. Is that cuza being Chinese? Why harass and be suggestive to my mom, too? I see my dad thinking my mom did it if he doesn't like something I was trying to think in private, often. I don't mean to be rude, but it sounds like I am submitting to bad people in apologizing properly.

You do act like I harassed someone, when I think I was just mad and they supposedly did it and I didn't really do anything like that directly at them like you think. I take it back. I don't mean it. You don't have to forgive me. Fine!

You all have announced you're liars and drained of any emotion for the likes of people such as myself. You used to act like the world was all that. But when I chose to open up, this is what it is. I never meant anything bad on purpose. I am 99.9% so careful, but if I do one thing by accident, probably fainting from stress and that I should react to insult.. you just take away my life and go on and want me to think about this 1 thing on and on. You never taught me nothing. You silently monitored and manipulated me. I was not provided with any emotion, so maybe I had none to judge with. I was harassed and tested and competed with because of being part Chinese. I don't wanna be mad about it, but it seems that's why I've gotten confused and done things without being able to think. You are just looking for unnatural ways of getting me in trouble and harming me in some way, emotionally or what be it. My dad should not be allowed to harm me in this. It seems he's gonna do it anyway. I probably would be taken away to an institute and later get out with a respectable life alone. But of the noises planted around me, maybe the police would accompany me in my new abode.

So, I am sorry for all I've done. I usually don't act directly mad, tho, so I don't like the inconvenience of people pretending I intend to be sarcastic. I am independent, and I didn't know I had problems. People always said how amazing I was until I grew up and racism came up even more.

I hope things are okay and you don't have to pay attention to me. About the fact people do, may I suggest finding ways of meeting other people of different ages and walks of life??

I hope it is okay I said all this. Trying to at least straighten things out as they are if I can now. I know you like to go crazy all over and pester/test me. Hope it works out?..

Ellen

I really liked the girl at the end who married as an exchange student her English teacher in Hungary.

The 1st boy was always on spot with how well he behaved. It was amazing. He wanted to get down to business and be good to the right people.

Ellen seemed okay. Hope things are going well for her.

TV

Ellen

I need to get

Bella Thorne's book next time I get around to the mall with money. By next week. It looks advanced for smart people who grew up. I don't know much about reading.

Plan

to get in physical shape rather than study music right now in college

seeing if adult gymnastics once a week opens up - 1 hour

I also go to Disney once a week.

I was gonna move into a college dorm. I'm hoping to make it in the entertainment world, selling my book and singing for now, but the book is only 15 pages long.

I've been rubbing it in myself to myself. :)

Apology

for times I thought rude things, didn't mean to or didn't know..

(music from Strange Magic)

This sounds a lot like Jersey Boys.

Apology

I was mad at someone for altering the world to hate me.. I think it's more than one person. I still don't take that.

I just ruined another mill (meal.)

My dad was all grumpy about me in attitude he secretly claims not to have, and I couldn't bring myself to go steady around it. :(

My Eating

I had a whole bowl of cooked okra last night.

You cannot punish a person with mind altering drugs.

Have you experienced

in the real world being shelved for posterity rather than going on? Like, you're an example and young people look up to you, but it's about them and not you? Imagine yourself put up in front of the world for kids to enjoy and it's about them in a way is never about you. Imagine the music and setting and sense the sensation!

No Hard Feelings

on my parents or anything

Discrimination

People are telling me I'm not that good cuz my weight won't lessen. I just noticed this fact.

Also, it is not peaceful in the foolishness of America or Orlando or Florida some. I feel a constant turmoil.

My weight won't lesson cuza my meds, I think. I try other ways.

I feel a constant turmoil in America over nothing, like people wanna leave now.

Most people can't seem to lose weight who aren't famous. People are so lazy. I didn't work out today cuz I wanna nap and I don't do abs/cardio 2 days in a row cuz it's new. It's easy to see if someone is trying or not to lose weight. Most people aren't happy with who they are. Like their parents each.

I mean no offense, just noticing facts as I go and trying to make an appropriate post outta them.

Dr. Phil - Facebook

My premature or maybe ultimate solution is to listen and quietly wish away the days I leave the house hopefully for good, but that's only if I do, what's it called, "student work" in a college? Sometimes, I think I am here to protect my parents from one another. I can't do that, for good, tho. Tho, I am already 28. Good advice.

Lunchtime

Nite Again Soon

I got a book last night.

Dr. Phil's 20/20 Diet.

Dr. Phi - Facebook

It is a sin to put yourself in that situation, but it grows by the years, it seems, until you realize ways to stop it.

Apology

Sorry if the all caps were startling..

"Upset"/..

It seems that people just don't wanna hear from me or something, but I was actually explaining myself and trying to apologize for anything that might have happened from people snapping offensive in some way thoughts in my head. I probably "had a nervous reaction." My dad has asked me to wait for 2 things. The 1st time he didn't really sound as friendly. He changed his mind but then bothered me in another way. My mom got upset this time when I asked. She was upset all morning I was just trying to eat my breakfast, using curse words in secret message yet taking everything from me if I thought of one. We never used to dwell on these things 10 years ago. I said I was sorry I did anything wrong. I know there is nothing wrong with asking when someone changes their mind. I'm not about to listen to my parents as a kid, neither. I want to make friends outside of my family. I don't like being pushed to my family all the time. My brother just wastes my life because he always wants his mom. What am I sacrificing for this people? How funny is that?? So, here's a brief of facts. I thought asking was good because it seems like they are just trying to make me feel off, not nurture my discipline by submitting to their presence/"existence." They do that here in Orlando. I'm 28. I'm not gonna be the one to take this. Fine. What about the trying to make me feel off? Is that something my therapist will help me with? She lives in Orlando, too. I know I don't have to ask, but it's the best thing to do to heal a relationship. :| I also don't believe it to be true that I am given all these unsaid rules not made clear to me like they just came out and constantly could randomly come out. Just for the sake of feeling in charge. That's not important to me. No one should suffer this. I know it could be more efficient overall. I just work this way. If it was something ongoing, I could see not doing it. I don't know, it's like dressing up as a clown to set these weird guidelines along the way that don't make sense. Don't make sense! I wouldn't do this with other people, so same with my parents. I don't listen at 28. I just don't break the law. What else?.. Like I said, I was just explaining what happened, not trying to just complain and criticize. I admit, this is my life. I'm surrounded by this. If you wanna know more, I am gonna see how much money I can make from selling things: my book, my singing.. Otherwise was gonna put myelf in a college dorm. It's not easy to commute to and from college. There is a community college, but I think it'd be too hard. I would go to the public college, which I can now afford. I dunno if I still have my scholarship at my original college. I have to ask again. They said I had a financial hold, but it should have been lifted by now. So, yea, just trying to explain things that happen in real life off the computer. There may be things that haven't been fully looked into. About the asking why people do things, they don't leave an explanation when there should be one. It might be private, but then you have to admit that when asked. About other people rubbing into me, I just said I felt uncomfortable. I don't wanna mess up.. I managed to do better last night. It's when I wake up and my mom's there sending secret messages. They are things I cannot say to anyone else.. They are bad and just because she feels uncomfortable. My parents send lies about what other people say and threaten to hurt people who are nice to me in how they act. I guess this'll be about all? Any problems with me explaining what I sometimes would ignore, apologies? I don't really want what is happening to me to happen to anyone else. Yes, you might know what I'm talking about. I guess you think I deserve it. No one deserves this. I was wondering what would happen if you brought up someone else all the time and as a false punishment when you did something to others. See, not a good idea. Not something I wanna worry over when nothing that bad has happened. You can talk about that, too. I think I've been treated badly and blame the adults making others mean to me. You think life for me is designed by my dad, but I know him better. You think it's just I take whatever anyone says like I don't matter but like I think I'm better? I don't believe in Jesus. I don't sit there not working, not doing anything, just to say I hate myself and I'm bad. That's what you have at the end for me. You think I have to be that way cuz my fam is from PA. Not so. You think I should just be submissive, but that's like sucking the soul outta me. I go about quietly not bothering anyone. That's what you do. No one else submits their soul. Submit to what, goodness or hating on yourself? I don't know how the end fits the beginning, but here it is if anyone wants to read it or wishes they could help. I guess I am saying I am a good person and am being bothered by the speakers in my room and controlling things loading on my computer at certain times. I did list my problems on my website. If you just say I'm bad, I'd say that doesn't explain how these mistakes are considered on purpose misdeeds. I don't wanna force anyone into anything about me. No one has to give me attention in this way. What I want is to be known I am good and to have some goals stakes in my life, like such and such would like to speak to me but only for a certain length of time. I have goals for a career. I might go to the college dorm. If I cannot sell things. So, I am very sorry, not sure if I should experiment being quiet again or that I typed all this.. I'll try to go onto other things and not get mad. I'll try to remember all the lessons I gave myself.. ignoring, there's something good, there's a reason, don't do it, etc. Yea, who wants to read all this? Why would I feel I need to fess up with these things and defend myself? Not defend as in fighting but seeing what sacrifices I am wanted to make and stuff and find out what it means eventually maybe.

Nite Soon

So

Why are the whinings from my mom my reaction being magnified? I thought I done good. You all just see the sparks flying. I am an adult. I know what I'm doing. Lotta people out there like me.

They keep making noises when I type or it's coming from the keyboard, too, sometimes. I guess not. What is going on? This isn't funny. Oh, it's my table. Not all, tho, probably.

What at all is appropriate of what my mom is doing? She's getting in the way of relationships. She's jealous. I know. But I am not to be confined for mixed race!

So Sorry

for my stupidity in being mad, but I was feeling hurt.

Website Update (cont.)

I even heard it.

Movies

I saw the animation, Strange Magic. It was excellent! Better than I could expect! One of the best I've seen. Trumps Frozen in many ways.

Why are people acting all like professional about being accepted over me?

Website Update

About Me - Magic

I saw just a white tail kinda glowing and fluffy disappear behind something, and there was nothing there. (1/23/2015)

Problem

I have a "personal" problem that someone thinks I was bad to curse on my blog about noises in my room.

It's unfortunate, but it was justified. They insulted me, but no one thinks I matter, anymore. I didn't ask for this to happen.

What makes you think

one person is worth more than another?

You all are pathetic criminals.

They have been pampering someone else against me becuase someone was mad. Wow, didn't do this before.

Problem

They keep being nice to this other girl and not me. I think they're just "a bunch of" racists, TBH, and listening too much to Dad. I may not be talking to you but someone else who will appreciate this post. It's okay, but like every time something happens to me it's for her. Stop making me feel guilty. I have manners. I have a personality I deserve. I might be slightly retarded but not rude. So what, no one is talking to me now. This is my blog. I get tossed aside for what others have done. I could die today. I have a long and vicious past with you all. No offense to anyone. Why would I want to feel what someone else gets and not me? =| You wanna "feel" something? I know it's just someone messing with me. It's like going on Facebook and finding a friend you wish to "remove" but don't.

I know no one likes me because they think I changed -for- Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. I am poor. I just redid my room. I had to shave my messy hair. What can I do? Just because someone else exists does not mean I have to foil them.

Problem

They keep making noises in my room like it's about someone else and not me. Well, I don't want to be rubbed in like this about mean people. What do you want? I disagree. I only believe it is fair for others to get attention. I don't agree these people are there to bow to. I am right.

Dr. Phil - Facebook

These girls seemed very inhibited and affected about their hormones.

---

The girls who had problems happen to them seem rather premature, like I was. The ones who make problems seem overly developed.

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I don't think I would report a bully cuz they could come back and hurt me more. Someone else would have to do it.

---

I submitted "the..story..of..my..life," again!

---

They are in denial that they have problems they can change themselves. The ones who are bullied probably weren't mostly in life-threatening situations necessarily, but you are right you need anonymous reporting from a 3rd party so the bully won't bully you for telling. That's why I don't like the idea of calling the police..

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1) Are bribes common in your household? N

2) Do you often make parenting decisions based on emotion? Y

3) Do you make excuses for your child's poor behavior? N

4) Do you cover for your child's mistakes? (i.e. pay fines, do undone homework, pay overages on cell phone, etc.) N

5) Does your child often try to manipulate you? Y

6) Do you ever wish others would change their behavior or attitudes to make things easier for your child? N

7) Do you give into your child just to keep the peace and avoid conflict? N

8) Do you tend to be lenient with your child? Y

9) Do you tend to not set boundaries or have trouble keeping them? Y

10) Do you have a hard time saying no to your child? Y/N

11) Do you allow your children to make their own choices or rules? Y

12) Does your child lack responsibility, self-control or motivation? Y

13) Has your child become more aggressive and irresponsible? Y

14) Does your child have issues with insecurity or self-esteem? N

15) Has your child become more demanding and selfish? N

Looks like I got 1/2 1/2 Y/N.

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You're always gonna run into the truth. My mom said I complained a lot when I was being critical or always criticizing was what she said. There's nothing wrong with what I did.

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I have tried talking online. They wanted me to go away. They even sent me to other sites, where I was also told to go away. I do it by chatting. I have a therapist and a psychiatrist. The link does look nice and would be a nice experience. I avoid sitations like that it seems, tho. I wanted to check myself into an institute, but I was just recommended to unemployment clubs and the like. I thought I was using my therapist. I don't know what to do next. She doesn't seem to help. She's nice, but she denies what I say and says it's schizophrenia.

They're wasting my time threatening me I can't meet people. They won't get outta my room.

Problem

Why are you acting like I did something? I think I made myself perfectly clear. You were mean to me. Not talking about any one person? Why am I being denied?

Problem

They keep calling me ***. They'll probably do more, but what I don't know. I found it a point that just says they did something wrong already.

Problem

They are trying to stimulate me with their messages and blame me for things I didn't do that don't matter.

Makes Sense

I think these people are coming from somewhere else. I need an outlet like a better "help" line or police who won't bucket me into the mental hospital. I need someone to put my parents in their place or get me some outlet for my talents so I can make enough money to live a comfortable life I need at this point. I heard these talents could make some money or at least be a cultural outlet and savior.

Why is it so quiet?

I guess they are finished/tired..

Sorry, but I really felt hurt. I don't know, I think it just bother me that something could happen that's not being prevented for me. Look at what bad care ya'll take of kids. I bet they all want attention in the same way. You're supposed to sit down and talk it out without throwing your computer against the wall.

Problem

They are reveling in someone getting something over me. How outlandish their manners.

I am glad if other people get to reach their dreams. I don't have some big grudge on the world.

This annoyingness won't stop. They are saying I don't get something and someone else does.

Dr. Phil

Today, we saw the long-awaited part 2 of the terrible teens-

I mostly like that skinny mom and girl, the one going into treatment. It's mostly like me, except I had the police to fight. Ha ha and I meant it. My parents will never admit to being mean in their attitude. I don't want to get closer to them like that.

I don't believe those centers necessarily to be good, as the one I stayed in we did nothing but be punished by being locked in the horrid building.

I was impressed that the girl who looked similar to part African-American turned around and was happy in the hands of authority away from the snotty girls who are probably racist, no offense to them tho.

It made me feel guilty during this concerning things.. My parents are indeed the ones with an attitude towards me. I want our relationship to have some propriety. The pros are all bad and say my personality is paranoia schizophrenia and made it die away.

You know living in Florida people are really mean and they think they all that. As we speak, I hear little faint messages that I believe to be lies or something to confuse me and consume me and waste away my life. I don't know what you don't want me to do, but I am gonna call the police if it gets too bad. I have to find away to do this without being put into treatment. I was gonna check myself into treatment, but my parents won't tell me the price. It's also dangerous. They are still lingering on that I just don't wanna deal with them rubbing in someone else getting attention over me. They hint messages at me without saying anything and then like k*** someone if I don't listen to it, when I think it's just something that came out and things will just keep coming out like that. If I move, these noises will still be here and I will have no one to keep me sane. I was even told to be locked up. I didn't do anything to deserve that. I feel that I am being disciplined by being put on psych pills I don't need. How can I live with people constantly talking to me in my room via how things on my computer load and these noises. I am already 28 years old. I need friends like that girl being locked up. My TV is making annoying suckling noises. They said someone I liked said what I did is "dead." (What I just wrote.) No, I am right. You guys are always mean to me. I don't care what mess you all are creating against me racially and combining it to tell me I'm bad. I will not be left to the mercy of following uptight parents who are privileged to waste me away in here so they don't go to jail for k***ing me. Now they said that person said this was "c***." That is not right. You do not do that to others and did not do it before. Stop lying. I'm trying to summarize how I feel. They keep adding annoying noises of people I don't like wanna talk to like this. They are rubbing in stuff all stuck up and senseless, just wasting their time on me. I was in the middle of a summary, and I can't keep having to go back and forth between posts. They won't be quiet. I didn't do anything. YOU DID. I will get you back for this by calling the police or something I hope.

I don't know what direction this is going.. but I am not gonna like "submit" myself to anyone. This is all just a big hullabaloo.

Don't you all have anything to do or talk about?

Friday, January 23, 2015

Showertime

Yikes! ;o

Sad

I wish I coulda otherwise politely ignore that which I do not know how to respond. I understood different forces at play. There, that's what I wish, and it's sorta what I did except with an upset feeling attached.

It's funny how the big thing is that it's to be against me.

I don't need a lesson in being humble. Just because I was praised for being good. Life has turned into a nightmare for no apparent reason.

When they rub it in, they try to hit a nerve each time.

Problems

So, why are you acting like only someone else deserves "a special moment?" Is it tacky? I hope you don't make it tacky. No, I will not listen to that you think I should be punished. Why is rubbing it in to me a part of something critical like that to you?